The question I always had and hated to answer from my relatives or friends, especially when attending wedding dinner or during Chinese New Year is: "Ah Sheng, do you have girlfriend already?" "Ah Sheng, quickly find a girlfriend la, Chinese New Year bring back, let grandma sees."I always answer them: "Yes, I hope will get one next year." "Ok, grandma. I do have some female friends, but most of them are not single anymore and some I don't even think they are interested in me." For my mum, she would always ask me: "I don't know what's wrong with you? Everyone seem like having girlfriends now, why you still don't want to find one??? Some of your friends are marrying already. Try to be a more humour guy, be outgoing, be generous, be more friendlier. Girls like this type of guy, ok?" I answer: "Yeah, mum...The problem is I don't understand what's my problem also. I think girls nowadays are more picky than guys. And perhaps I am just a school teacher. They think school teachers are boring and not rich enough. " Sometimes, it ended up with a small arguement, and my mum always said I gave too much "unreasonable"reasons, I am lacked of confidence and securities...The list goes on...
The truth is...Yes, I also hope to have a girlfriend which I can end up marrying her too...But I don't like to be a desperado, "chasing" and wooing multiple girls at the same time. It's crazy and I can't focus, because I can only put one girl in my heart at a time. Back to my teacher-training-institute life, I did had several girls I am interested with in my list. But those silly and pathetic stories should be buried deep down under six feet. I am working as a teacher now, and most of my friends are ladies and they are teachers too. Yea, some are single ladies. To me, I think Asian ladies are not really open-minded or sporting enough. Sometimes, you invited them for a movie hang out or lunch date, and you got denials most of the time. And maybe she is really BUSY and you are not her first PRIORITY. To me, if a lady hardly gives you any chance to be near to her or spending time with her, that means she is not totally into you. The first time, second time and third time you got the same answers, sometimes you started to doubt and questioned yourself....Am I doing this right? Is she afraid of me or hating me? Should I keep contacting her? This is my only phobia in relationship: Investing in something unfruitful. I am willing to sacrifice my time, energy and riches (well, I don't have any) if things work out with someone I love (and she should love me too, no one-sided feeling please). To me, the pinnacle of a relationship with a lady is: Getting married, setting up a family with her and staying together until old.
And in terms of physical appearance, I am not the toughest, the tallest and the most handsome, popular guy ever since my secondary school years. All I can do is be my own self, be kind to people who are kind to me, being friendly, being protective to ladies and the list goes on...When I was in my younger age, I was aggressive and short-tempered (only my parents and some of my closed friends knew that), but now I am a cool person and I always sort things out in a more relaxed way. However, nowadays, we can't control what ladies see in us men. Majority ladies always go for guys they think handsome? rich? tall? treat them poorly? What else? To me, if the ladies have the right to choose their guys, why can't guys choosing their girls too, right? To me, the most important thing for two persons is communication and being ownselves, because it's an issue if either one noticed behavioral changes before and after marriage. That is why many young people married and divorced at such a young age. Being in a relationship is not a child's play, where you can be pretentious or being sarcastic to each others.
To me, having a girlfriend is a great advantage, because you know you have another responsibility, which is to be someone's boyfriend. You have to plan for the date, where to go for breakfast/lunch/dinner/supper, what presents to give during New Year, Valentines, birthday, Christmas, anniversary, her parents' birthday. Having a girlfriend motivates a man to make plans for future and maybe helps to discipline a man too...Maybe the man will reduce his bad habits of smoking, drinking and gaming 24-7.
In the end, I think every single man or lady, should be given a second chance. If the mutual feelings are slightly compatible, why not giving a try? Everyone deserves a second chance, right?
PS: This is just a random rambling, I am just a bored, single guy and I am updating my blog...
